I Left My Heart in Santa Rosa, New Mexico

I forgot myself.

Let's be honest.  I spent the last three years forgetting myself in an attempt to be normal. I will never be normal. I will never be that person. I will never forget myself again. 

The person I tried so hard to forget was the person who felt closer to herself when she was closer to nature. I found myself in the quiet of the stones and fields and abandoned homes. Lost in the midst of three trailers located one mile from the road in the middle of a field that seemed to dwarf below the mountains.

I felt frightened by the enormity of the rocks and the trees and the stones. I felt lost in the wind and that at any moment anything and everything could happen and I would be lost forever.

But in that loss of control and self, I found myself. I found my heart. I found my calling.

Thank you Santa Rosa for reminding me of what truly drives this beating pulsing heart.

All my Exes Live in Texas: Cadillac Ranch

The last thing I remembered about Amarillo was the wind. The wind would blow so hard that the dirt and sand would sting your eyes and skin as it gathered in small little tornadoes in the road.

I remembered Stanley Marsh, the local eccentric, who would prance around at every one of the city's parades in a white suit and his troupe of young boys following behind.

He was hardly the local hero, but he made things interesting.  He also made interesting things and one of those things was a exhibition of discarded Cadillacs buried face down in the dirt in the middle of a green field.

I used to live in Amarillo when I was in high school. Local understanding dictated that there were only three things you could do in Amarillo for fun: go cow-tipping, drinking in the canyons or in a field, and hangout at Cadillac Ranch.  Cadillac Ranch is hardly a ranch per say. It's more of a field surrounded by endless nothingness not far from the Historic Route 66. You can't really see it from the road. But, during the day, you can see the cars lined up down the road with tourist walking to the Holy Cadillac Grail.

On our trip westbound, I brought my children into this life I once knew and let them take part in art in history as they tagged Cadillacs with their mark from discarded spray paint cans.

Briley's Birthday

She was two weeks late. She sat on my pelvis like 8 pounds of bowling ball. I'm pretty sure she thought she owned my body. I craved Waffle House eggs, bacon, potatoes, and grits every single day. I was sick every single day of my pregnancy and the meanest person ever. I gained 40 pounds with her. I had heartburn even when I drank water.They said it was because she would have a lot of hair. She has a head full of hair. She refused to cry when she was born. She only drank goats milk and refused to drink any other milk as a baby.. She slept in my bed (and continues to sneak into my bed) until she was 3. I am thankful for every single year I have with my 6 year old firecracker. Yesterday was her birthday. Happy Birthday Briley H. Diva.

Renaissance Festival

These past few weeks have been incredibly hard for me personally. I've held myself hostage because a lot of issues I've suppressed.  The funny thing about hard times is that you see who your real friends are.  I am blessed to be surrounded by a number of people who have made me accountable to getting out there and still living. My dear friend, Janae, made plans for me to attend the Charlotte Renaissance Festival.  First of all, I've never been to ANY festival like this at all.  Second, my excitement was slightly muted by my current trials.  Third, I had a helluva good time. We ate food. We saw a show. We had Chicken and Chips. We bought candles. I took pictures like a tourist.  I remembered happiness for the first time in a very long time.  I have gratitude for the friends that God has sent me.  I am eternally thankful for these weekends.  Here are a few pictures from that awesome day!

Where Have You Been Ollie Wills?

I have the distinguished honor of getting to work for myself and take photos all the time.  If I had to compare my love, I would say that it is very much like a happy marriage.  There are many more good days then bad days.  But I do have to say that I have an insane amount of gratitude for realizingmy dream and focusing on making my craft better.  Here's some food for the starving artists soul. I welcome criticism. These pictures are from various places I have shot in the last few weeks (yes, I'm insanely behind).

So for the past few weeks, I've been working with a wonderful company Charlotte Fashion Plate on their company rollout, SEO Management and photography.  This is been a dream realized.  I now can focus on my dream and my family.  I feel like I have spent so much of life planning for the start of life which has been.

I am thankful for the family that has supported me throughout this process of who what where when and when and when.  I appreciate those who stood by me and told me, "You are going to be somebody, not that you're not already somebody."  I appreciate my partner sitting with me through many a long nights that he didn't have to.  I appreciate the time he spent watching my children while I sometimes worked for 12 hours straight.

EYE opening.

Gratitude amasses within my soul to the point that it's almost overwhelming.

I thank you all for believing in me.

Cam's Graduation

I have a very talented cousin.  He, like me, is a photographer.  He's also currently doing his internship at the SF Chron.  I don't think there's a volume of books that could describe how effing proud I am of this man.

I didn't have the luxury of seeing my cousins a lot growing up.  I was shuffled from home to home and family member to family member.  I am about 10 years older than Cam so along with this shuffling around, there was the significant age gap. With that being said, it's amazing to see that despite these common life hangups, we actually have a great deal in common.

I thank my grandmother everyday for that genetic disposition.

So, I want to take this time to wish wonderful blessings upon my amazing cousin for this beautiful accomplishment and this crossing of the threshold of life.

No more excuses little cous. You are now officially a man.

Congrats Cam, and I can't wait to see what you will be able to show the world very soon.

xox Cous T

Back to School is Back to Basics

Some parents are devastated at the thought of their children starting/going back to school.

I'm not one of those parents.

Though it's safe to say that I enjoy a healthy relationship with my children, they are more like little annoying siblings rather than the focus of my every waxing and waning emotion. We are more like business partners. I bring in the money, they make their demands.

Actually, I have two pretty great kids are everything to me.

One of these great kids started school for the first time and the other one continued his tenure since he's apparently ready for college at the tender age of 10.

I love it when my kids go back because 1.  There's no more expensive daycare costs. 2. They get back into a wonderful routine of eat.sleep.rave.repeat. 3.  I no longer have to be the sole provider of the entertainment.

But, now that summer has come to an end, it's back to what I know. It's back to basics.  No more schedule interruptions for the foreseeable next 8 months.  There will be no worrisome nightmares about what we're going to do when they get out.  We are back to the things that we all know.

School time is marked by football games, fall hikes, and league sports.  It's also a time for father/daughter dances, science fair projects, and showing the world that my kids are the shit. I will admit....I get a kick out of getting the opportunity to prove this to you world!

This is oddly the single most selfish act I will commit every year. But who cares? Every thinks their DNA is the best and each school, I'm given the opportunity to put my offspring in the stable and shout "Their Off!"

Here's to another year with the lively little monsters who have filled my heart with so much love and sarcasm.

My Last Trip to San Antonio, TX.

It's almost a year to the date from when my grandmother died. I was extremely close to my grandmother.  Most days, I still talk to her and ask her if my life is going the way she would have it go.  My grandmother was my mother by all intents and purposes. 

When I was younger, I lost my first of many mothers, my maternal grandmother, Margie. After that, I remember praying to God to send me a mother.  Throughout the years, he has sent me numerous mothers including my mother who lives in Selmer, TN, Melinda Ann.  She taught me how to treat everyone like they are blood. He also sent me my other mother in Thaxton, MS.  She taught me how to appreciate every lesson life taught me.  She also sent me my grandmummy, who taught me how to love everyone as if the Lord embedded that feeling in your heart.

I was so very close to  her. She brought so much love to my life. And, even in the last days, when the life started to leave her voice, she was still there telling me to charge forward and do the best I could because she was already proud of me.

I miss her EVERY SINGLE DAY.

These pictures I'm about to share are from the day of her funeral.  We walked around San Antonio, TX. I absolved myself to making this my last trip I would ever take to San Antonio, TX.  This city was her last resting place therefore, it is my last visit.

I know it's taken me a long time to post these.  However, consider this my moment of grief.

Dismals Canyon, Alabama: My Haven Away From Home

I'm not a creature of habit for the most part.  Most times, in my life, when I find I'm doing something that IS becoming a bit too monotonous, I have to do something to shake things up.  But, lets be fair. Some habits are pretty cool.

What is a habit?

I define a habit as something that done more than three times. A tradition is done countless times.

Dismal's Canyon in my new tradition, although I have only visited it twice. However, it is a tradition that has become one because my mother has taken both of my children down in this canyon on hikes, treating both children as if this was her first adventure there.

I'm so lucky to have this very special private tradition for the children, my mother, and myself. When you look at these pictures, feel my memories and embrace nature.

What is Dismal's Canyon?

Dismal's Canyon Conservatory is "Intentionally private, Dismals Canyon - in keeping with its pristine surroundings - offers a quiet and unspoiled oasis in Alabama’s last secret hiding place. A secluded wilderness filled with natural phenomena tucked deep within the foothills of the Appalachian Mountains." 

It is also one of the many sad spots and stopping places along the trail of tears.  Carvings can still be observed on the walls within the canyons and there's almost a haunting feeling as you pass within the water washed walls of history.

Belmont Soda Fountain: Small Town Flavor and Warmth

Tis a family past time of our to venture to the nether regions of the county to go to a small all-American town by the name of Belmont.  In that small little town is a Main Street where there is a park, a coffee shop, a bakery, a general store and the Belmont Soda Fountain. The floors are pristine hardwoods with original hardware unique to the original drugstore that formerly took residence.  The Belmont Soda Fountain is family owned and passes that same atmosphere onto it's local and faithful clientele.  Recently, I had the opportunity to host one of my engagement shoots at this store.  True to nature, they worked with me to accommodate the needs of my client letting us enter the store 30 minutes early and even making an amazing Belmont Soda Fountain Banana Split as a great prop for the experience.

I am sincerely thankful for the work that I do and the opportunity to work with creativity and business that foster creativity.

As many of you know, I am a huge supporter of buy local and support local.  These businesses rely on vendors like us to make them reach far beyond their community.

It's a beautiful thing.

xox Ollie

www.facebook.com/belmontsodafountain

www.belmontsodafountain.com

Around the World in 8 Whole Hours

Once upon a time, I took a trip. The plan was to travel around the world and end up whenever my eyes opened. 

That place ended up being Dodge City, Kansas...Wyatt Earp City. The year was 2012.

I doubt people dream of this place when their whisked away at night to dream land.  But, this was it.  This was the place of my dreams.  The spot where my feet decided to plant for an hour or so. A place where the streets were paved with cobblestone, restaurants manned by the world, and abandoned beautiful buildings.

They were absolutely beautiful, the buildings, that is. They were red, blue, green and purple.  ROY G. BIV must have fathered enumerable painters and muralists who chose the street names and colors.  And, for a gal who liked the color red...oh red..oh how red abounded. I saw my life flash before me in a haze of understanding.

It made no sense...this town. It was literally in the middle of nowhere. It sat roughly 4 hours from Tulsa and 4 hours from the nearest city in Colorado (or maybe even the state line).  There were shops and theaters and bars.  The Italian restaurant was owned by a Hispanic Family. Yet, I saw no Mexican restaurants.  The streets were all frontier.  Cowboys lined door frames.  Bulls grazed on leaves of stone.  Auction blocks ran the town.  Many streets had no names.

This was my kind of randomness. My town. It was me.

Maybe that's why I stopped randomly on my way to nowhere in my general tour around the world.  Maybe I decided I needed a breath of fresh air. Ya..that was it.  Fresh air.

Saturday Traditions: Brunch

One of my family's favorite traditions is "Saturday Brunch."  That is the one day during that week that we get to have our "cheat morning" and eat out at our favorite local restaurant.  A year ago, that restaurant was Dilly Deli. It's a quaint little cafe nestled in the heart of downtown Tulsa.  Sadly, Tulsa is no longer my home, therefore, Dilly Deli is no longer my tradition. 

For the past year, we have tried to find our Dilly Deli with no luck. Really, there's no such luck.  THERE IS NO RESTAURANT LIKE DILLY DELI.  With that being said, it was our stroke of luck that I found "Toast Cafe." Toast Cafe is another "quaint" cafe situated in Ballantyne, NC right off of Rea Rd. Hardwood floors, dark interior, bright yellow walls, with a pub feel mark this little cafe.  No surprising, the food is awesome:  REAL homefries, REAL eggs, FLUFFY omelettes. 

Living Vicariously: The Travels of June Grayjoy/Prague

I wish I could say that as I  was responsible for all the wonderful travels that grace the pages of Blue Arden photo. Unfortunately, I am not.  However, I am blessed to have friends who travel the world who share their adventures with me and continue to inspire me.  In the next few months, I will be visiting June to catch up on much needed friend time. Until then, she continues to send me appetizing pictures of her musings and misadventures (to entice me to move my ticket date up more).

Who is June?

June is my dearest (xoxo) friend I met while on one of many journeys around the US in my quest to learn everything about everything.  June just so happens to be my artistic kindred spirit who is, too, in search of something great worth learning on this amazing Earth. She just so happens to be my one and only and first travel correspondent for Blue Arden ;)

Why Prague?

Why not?

What is there to see in Prague?

Lots and lots of frothy golden brew, the astronomical face clock (refer below to June pics), the art movement (contemporary art movement worth screaming for), medieval warrens and saints  (actors dressed up as so of course), and much more.  June, went to a symphony, museum, and toured one of the oldest cities in Europe!

This past weekend, June went to the beautiful and historic city of Prague (grrrr..shaking in my boots with jealousy).  Follow her journey through these awesome pictures:

Good Italian Food & Games With Julia (AKA B) in little ole Petersburg.

Julia is one of my good friends I met while at school in Petersburg, VA.  She's originally from the Ukraine, but has been a Unites States citizen for well over 9 years.  She loved it here so much that she became an officer in the United States Army.  I mean, how rad is that. 

On one of our nights off, we decided to head down to downtown Petersburg for a bit of food and fun. If you have never been to Petersburg, be sure to go check it out.

Scenes from my Petersburg Summer...

...as in Petersburg, Virginia that is.  Petersburg is one of the most beautiful cities I have visited. There's a lot to be said about this quaint military town nestled right outside of Richmond, Virginia.  It is easy for any visitor to take the view for granted given the run-down nature of many of the buildings and how the lines blur between history and socio-economic distress.  But, it is VERY charming.  There are small pubs, cobblestone streets, and an old train station to name a few places.

A Birthday Spent Right: Food, Fun, & Friends

This past summer, I got the opportunity to train at Fort Lee, Virginia to complete my final phase of training as a 2LT.  The great thing about being a member of the Army was the opportunity to meet so many great people.  The unfortunate thing about being in the Army was constantly being away from family.  But, in the absence of family, there is a silver lining: lasting bonds and friendships. 

I was super down about being away from my family on my birthday.  I rallied a few of my roll dawgs together and asked them to join me for a dinner at an interesting pub in downtown Richmond called Penny Lane Pub.  Talk about an awesome time! I was surprised by how many people actually showed.  Not only had we had a full day of training, but we also had early morning training the next day.  It was great to see so many people show up to share a bit of food and drink in honor of my 32nd birthday. 

Hometown Holiday: New York, NY

Most people don't have the distinct honor of saying that they were born on one of the greatest cities on Earth! I can! My claim to fame is being born on the sinking metropolis of beauty and art.  The US center of fashion.  Sadly to say, I have yet to attend the coveted fashion week.  But that's not off the table for my life just yet!